♥love him now and forever♥

2010-05-08T16:41:00.002+08:00

hey peeps !
been long since i last posted . sigh ! ~
so much has happened i dono how to say .
exam screwed up and stuffs what to do . lol
aiya update another day bah .
mother day coming dono what to do . hahs -.-
zzz , hoping mye ends faster i gonna pierce again .
should i pierce tongue ?

2010-04-18T03:25:00.000+08:00

SIGH ! ~ tears

2010-04-16T16:22:00.000+08:00

After all , everything has just ended on 150410 .
after saying so much on facebook it still useless , you wont return to my side .
after getting hurts 2 times i still getting hurt for the 3rd time .
crying and crying uncountrolably .
fuck up life .
so , putting so much effort trying to salvate this relationship is just my willfull thinking , no point when he doesn't even want . and now up till this end . break up.

2010-04-03T17:48:00.002+08:00

sigh ! ~
everything has changed slowly .
baby used to be the person who i can accost to , but now he's no longer the one .
i find that we are slowly drifting and drifting .
the image of you in my mine are no longer the same , it turned blur-ed .
baby gets acrimoniously easily this few days , i guess that you are getting more and more tired of this relationship too .
you may not feel it , but the feeling that i gets is more and more deeper .
i find u getting more abstruse .
why baby ? i dont want things to come to this type of status and slowly put a stop to this journey of love .
remember what you promise me ? i dont want your promises to become empty promises like what my ex used to do to me you understand ? i know you truely know what the feeling would be like to be treated in this way .
sigh ! ~
i guess we seriously need a good and peaceful talk down some days to try salvage this relationship in order to keep it lasting . D:

2010-03-23T11:12:00.000+08:00

Tired of schooling ! ~
the old shuhui has died . i'm just like a totally changed person .
and i dont know what's that stopping me from doing all the good stuffs .
i dont like my current life .

2010-03-17T14:26:00.002+08:00

so bored ! ~
sigh life just gets boring when i dont have an aim , a goal or something i wanted to do.
and i just gets tired over everything thats around me -.-

2010-03-14T18:54:00.002+08:00

back posting again .
hmm ,
i finally found out the one and only reason why i hated going into relationship .
and the same old problems is always there .
kor , you always said that i'm soft hearted but am i really ? this question really bothers me alot .
and till now i still cant figure out

baby , can you tell me what you really wants ?
i seriously very fedup already .
tired of it .

2010-03-08T22:12:00.002+08:00

hihi dudes ,
i'm back posting again (:
rotting this few days .
basically i just spent my days going to school , out with friends , stead or rotting at home .
life seems rather useless to me now -.-
After tons of counselling in sch or at CGC i feel that my obnoxious temper still cant seem to change . my sprouting of vulgarities still cant seems to reduce .
my mind concept is also getting more and more pessimistic .
i just feel that nothing can no longer change la , my mother is stubborn and i am also stubborn how can we get winwin solution like that ? Oo
haix ! ~ if things carry on like that i think me and my mother relationship will drift further and further apart and by then i dono what to do to revive the relationship between me and my mother le .

2010-01-24T23:06:00.002+08:00

today woke up eat breakfast than bathe .
rotrot till 5.06p.m
went to grandma house , meet neighbour than go expo for the gain city de sale .
see cameras buy cameras eat dinner than went back to grandma house downstair slack .
after that come back home paintpaint till now just paint finish .
LOL ! yawnyawn * tired .
i go bathe le want go orhorh le .
nightnight ! :D

2010-01-23T09:46:00.002+08:00

[220110]

Went school late , blablabla .
ez-link tio confiscated thn forget it walk in class . Miss tan give the newspaper got worm siial -.-
make me like moving here and there . than after that dismissal le , we go back home . i sit at sofa sit till fall asleep end up overslept for the hospital doc's appointment . thn grandma kpkb after that went out half way le mum call to say no nid go ask me go back . i'm like am i a toy i already walked half way -.- so go basketball court to find my brother shot two time got some prob with neighbour . IDIOT SIIAL !
nehmind go back tio kpkb by grandfather again , sua dulan go play pool and bowling . than actually meeting curtis . end up i went off without telling . sorry for wasting u and ur friend's time . sorry for going off just like that . hope u forgive bah .
playplayplay . than neighbour decided to walk back from tamp safra . end up pangseh me they walk so fast -.-
i walked alone than aft that when crossing the road i nearly got bang down by 2 cars . LOL !
sigh ~
didn't expect everything to turn out this way .

2010-01-19T23:15:00.003+08:00

Current song : 我不想忘记你
Current mood : moodless
Today went school as per normal , nearly late again .
reach school on the dot than see the jiao bin teacher -.-
what should i do siial , piang early in the morning no mood le siial .
than study also no mood .
Sian ~ tmr got physics quiz so called a mini test .
where has my carefree life gone to ? D:
whr has the lifestyle i used to lead gone to ?
pains me to be moving forward in these ways , it pains me to head this lifestyle .
SIGHS ~
i'm tired D':

2010-01-18T21:12:00.003+08:00

hihi readers ! :D
I'm back posting again .
i'm getting more and more lazy to post le leh ! :x
andand rather busy with homeworks this few days ,
sian siial now de school like .
i hate sec 3 life no longer carefree in terms of homework ! T.T
haixhaix , so long since i ever had no homework .
i guess that day will never ever gonna come back to my side ever again .
Hmmm .. late for school today again . reach school at 8.43am
hahas the security guard uncle disturb me again . ><
after that went up staircase saw MR LIM.KH TEACHER eeyer disgusting i hate it ! -'-
i want mdm yani as my formteacher back ! D':
I WANT MY CLASS BACK ! T.T

2010-01-17T21:14:00.003+08:00

Hi passersby i am back posting all thanks to rambutan ><
hmmm today quite fun .
started my day off like shit , aft that went brkfast with family .
happens that the coffee shop so many bees flying around omg ! i so scared that i shouted and nearly given up on eating the rest of my food and my drinks siial .
everybody was staring and laughing at me . so ps :x
after that went home shower than headed to fetch wifey to bedok kfc find tengteng (:
hahas funfun .
today text so little wor . but have alot of fun outside wor .
so not that bored .
its been such a long time since i ever laugh so sacasticly again le . really missed those days .
sec 3 days really sucks , i hate it . D:
haixhaix .
walkwalk saw wentao de korkor so went to disturb him .
hahas he has candy floss hair .
suggested him to dye his hair light pink and keep mostarch .
becomee candy floss and sell at pasar malam . :x
hahas !
shhhhh ~
i think nobody will want buy , hahas i'm so mean .
okays after that went library de toilet than went back home straight aft that .
today is another memorable day . :D
i like it (:

2010-01-17T00:29:00.001+08:00

hi all . i'm nt shuhui . i'm her rambutan ! come here help her rebirth her blog . she tis lazy pig . tell her to update oso dunno hw to update de . SO RAMBUTAN! U SEE TIS MUST UPDATE LIAO HOR ! come to an end here !

2010-01-03T15:35:00.002+08:00

woohoo ! ~
tmr will be first day of sch to be in upper sec quite excited though .
although diff class with laopo le but nehmind we will be active in msg ! :D
aft school will be heading to tamp with laopo . hehe ><
will text alot ppl during lesson time hahas .
hmmm , but still need go out enjoy and have fun with alot ppl also .
cant neglect them too :]
kaes , later maybe going out with laopo to eat ice cream chef .

2010-01-03T00:32:00.003+08:00

woke up quite late today than call my friend chat on fone . .
aft that comfirmed with wanqi jiejie 5 o'clock come fetch us than we headed to ehub eat pasta mania eateat than go prawn fishing ! omg it was real awesome man ! but so pain when got bite by it's claws D:
awwww !
but overall its worth it (:
next time come with friend :x
pictures will be uploaded asap :D

2010-01-02T00:39:00.003+08:00

i'm back just to update the pics that i missed out .
uh , quite lazy nehmind another day than post the rest (:

2010-01-01T17:07:00.002+08:00

311209 is a fun day , but just a pity that i have to go home early D:
went vivo for countdown . stand for the whole of 7 hours .
theres a group of ppls which are quite old tht are standing infront of me and Le'Ting . and there's a fat guy who keeps shaking his butt there as if its very nice . but seriously it sucks can ? -.-
uh nehmind forget it overall quite fun though ..
later than post again bah i go shower going out le :x

2009-12-30T23:57:00.001+08:00

rawrrrrr !
mother and neighbours are always against me .
whatever i do they just dislike .
like they hate me like that .
ah forget it .
shall not say so much .
if not my mood will turn more and more worst .
byes ,
tc .

2009-12-26T00:23:00.002+08:00

This year's christmas is real fun !
thanks to great neighbours , which made it thumbs up ! :D
tomorrow going mount faber with neighbours , guess i will enjoy it too ! ><
headed to parkway straight aft i shower .
cab down to meet irene and ahxiong .
collected cake than went to GIANT buy stuffs for steamboat for night .
done with buying jiu came back prepare food and everything , help ah hock uncle to celebrate his birthday spray all over the place :x
aft that drank two cups of red wine my face turn red -.-
was very hot for that 10 to 20 mins .
hahas , it was real funny .
aft that my grandfather turn damn high he drank alot of cans that he was like dancing .
hahas ! so CUTE loh ! :D
lastly belated merry xmas guys ! (:

2009-12-23T14:49:00.002+08:00

this few days feeling so shity siial .
everyday rot at home . go out only at bedok areas nia -.-
photos will be updated real soon .
due to lazy-ness and lappy prob photos are neglected .
haix , i swear i want go countdown for new year ! D:
gonna ask laopo if she wants to go countdown if she wants will jio more ppl go tgt .
chalet & bbq was a total gone case . =.="
due to budget-ness .
anw recently i am in love with two songs ,
雨愛 and and chai bu tou .
ok , i guess i have to offline and bath soon .
meeting my friend at 4 and yet i am still at home :x

2009-12-22T23:44:00.002+08:00

haix ,
today whole day dono starhub , network , my phone or my sim card got prob .
whole day cant call through my friend , neither can i send one message smoothly .
getting real pissed off by it .
what can i do ?
i need to contact ppl urgently yet i cant , come back home .
my brother want use my comp , want snatch with me .
haixhaix . i am seriously getting tired .
whole day so moody .
what else can i do ?

2009-12-20T22:06:00.002+08:00

Today woke up quite early cos of some stupid nightmares that made me quite scared .
after that darling piggy talk to me on msn ,
he calmed me down than awhile irene came to my house i bath-ed waited for brother de tuition end than we car-ed down to suntec de carrefour bought things than go back bedok below grandpa's house gathering
quite fun though .
but throughout the thing i was not that hyper cause too tired and feel quite breathless .
sat on the chair and fall asleep awhile later my bro woke me up , poof ! there i go back at my house posting xD
hahas , whole day msged hongri .
he's funny though . but keep say i naughty girl -.-
stupid i'm not ok :D
i am a good girl xD

2009-12-19T23:00:00.003+08:00

today woke up at 12 ++
jiu msg silly darling piggy ..
but he 4.19 than reply , but nehmind cause i know he got lots of school stuffs to finish up i dont blame him :D
aft that went karaoke at grandpa's hse downstair cause got the christmas party quite fun ..
today de unpleasant things jiu dont bother to say le ..
sing quite little today,
got church de team come and sing christmas songs for us.
after that take food eat ..
eat abit only than continue singing again .
suddenly have gastric pain but i still drink 1 full cup of red wine ..
end up my gastric pain turn worst -.-
but aft awhile jiu hao le ..
thats roughly bout all for today loh .

tmr maybe going suntec , aft that aftnoon come back eat log cake than chitchat till night loh ..

2009-12-17T16:12:00.003+08:00

today nt much to post about wor ..
woke up quite early today .. had my breakfast at lunchtime , aft tht use comp non stop untill 6 plus non stop .. fell asleep 7 plusplus jiu wake up thn off comp bath thn plan go grandma house have dinner but yet .. din't have my dinner jiu come back le . LOL ! today one meal only .. dots
ok still waiting for silly darling piggy de msg .. i think i stop my post here bah ! (:
byes , tc ! :D

silly darling piggy is busy with his stuffs now ..
but i promise no matter how long it takes or how late u will finish up i'd still wait..
because loving someone endures everything ,
love isn't about the words we say the actions we do the hearts we brak . but its about people who can look at each other and just know ..
now , i am giving u the power to break my heart but i am entrusting u that u will nt ..
u said u will not hurt me , i choose to believe u ..
thats why i'm willing to wait for u till jan .
i had nvr imagine that i would slowly fall in love with you .
i had nvr imagine that we would be more than just friends .

2009-12-16T22:45:00.005+08:00

hello ! :D
i'm back posting ..
this few days nothing much to post .
ytd went out buy shorts with kailin ! :D
chat quite alot .. seriously hahas we think mostly the same things wor i realise .
shld go out more often ! :D
ohoh ya , mustmust go out with other gans also ! <33
DARLING PIGGY ! i love die you la ! <3
i promise i'll wait for u till jan alright ?
i believe u can make me happy make me feel blessed de yeah ?
i trust u tht u wont make me hurt ..
i will change for u , trust me :D
i dono if we tgt how long cn we last but we will last as long as we cn right ?
although i abit no confidence in rs le but i promise i'll slowly boost up all the confidence again ..
u know in rs what i asked for and i know wht u asked for yeah ,
so we will try and change to what each other wants their partner to do yeah ?

2009-12-12T21:49:00.004+08:00

fuck up house , fuck up family .
no mood to stay at home seriously . haixhaix
why does our house have to always be this way .
why do i always have to face all this problems .
stop going overboard , stop being so selfish , so unreasonable .
stop making me sick and tired of everything .
STOP STOP STOP !
i dont want to go on ! D':
i dont want to cry everyday .

thanks aloyscious gan xiao boy . for enlightening me .
thanks for ur listening ears .
thanks for ur understanding . (:
I WILL REMEMBER WHAT I PROMISE U DE , MUST RMB WHAT U PROMISE ME TOO ! :D
thanks jason for trying to counsel me .
thanks for showing me the vid .
thanks for being so caring . (:

2009-12-05T22:58:00.005+08:00

Today , woke up very late .
comp-ed awhile than went to celebrate great grandma de birthday .
happy birthday great grandmother ! :D
love die u la ^^
after that jeffrey uncle actually say want go Kbox de .
Butbut end up never leh D:
sadsad . so early have to go home T.T
ended up blogging now loh :D

wellwell , i see that you have move on le .
than i find that i have no reason to be held back and sadsad everyday bah .
i think those messages should be deleted already bah . (:
we cant be stead but at least we are still friends now .
i'm glad enough le . :D
good luck in everythink u do bah , jiayousjiayous ! (:
its time i really move on alone le bah :D

TO EDISON KOH ZHEN JIE : kor , u also must jiayous kaes . remember what you promise me hor lets move on tgt bah , i believe u can do it de (:

sometimes what i wanted will not be what i get at the end of the day . all i could do is to let go , accept it and move on (:

2009-10-18T00:02:00.003+08:00

haix. i really getting more and more sick and tired of everything that is happening on and on over and over again siial.
i say bye and bye alot of times to you le, but i dono why i always awhile jiu buey tahan want message you de. haix i miss you too much la. i love you too much. sorry that wo fang bu xia ni, sorry wo chen wei ni de fu dan..
wo hao xiang hao xiang he ni yi qi chen dan shuo you de shi qing shuo you de bu gao xin de shi.
no matter happy times or sad times i just want to spent my times with you, and i wanted you very badly.在我心里你always is唯一.. i really cherish you alot.. and all i ever wanted was to be by ur side when u need help or a listening ear, and to always be taking care of you. always loving you.
i felt like going missing but everytime i does that half way through i will break down. haix today i really cried.. i really very tired.. tired of hiding my emotions, tired of things happening,tired of getting hurt. do you guys know how my heart is ache-ing right now? do you know how long i have been bearing those painful tears and painful emotions in me? i felt numb. In tears when i'm typing the message to jason.
haix. in tears when i typing bout how i felt to Edison Koh Zhen Jie kor. in tears when those flashbacks of things that have been happening to me in past.
You will never know how much it hurts to be missing you and losing you.
haix i just felt like cutting my hand but i didnt because i dont want u to ignore me.
haixhaix.. felt like dying siial..
i love you, i miss you,
i really cherish u alotalot.

2009-10-17T13:11:00.004+08:00

看着星星想着你
在我心里你是唯一
you are the star
that i believe
cause i can feel you in me..
依然沉默的你却又悄悄离开..
Eng paper2 37.5/60
chinese paper2 43.5/60
chinese paper1 31.5/70
liT 36/80
maths paper2 29/50
the rest forgotten le.
all did very badly.
and my mood was all screwed up becox of it.
my tears was like filled with tears when i see all the result but i cannot cry infront of my friends and make them worry mah.
i dont have a plan for my future, i dont have a goal in my studies.
thats why i am always bored. thats why i am so useless.
Ytd my neighbour told me alot of things.
she always blame her parents why they did nt go work and give her money to study, why must they make her life so bad.
But she still very xiao shun.
than i reflect. why am i so bad, so selfish i always think bout myself.
you already worked very hard and give in to me, give all the good things to me and not to yourself. yet i still neglect your feeling.
holiday i finding work, and i will give u 50% of it. i promise.
sorry for making your life so bad, so Xinku.
i dont know how to be a good daughter i'm sorry.
I try my very best to do all kinds of goods things already but i just gets distracted very fast. i do good things and i trying to be good but yet dono who appreciated. i very tired.
sorry..
i really need sometime to seat down and really reflect to myself.
need sometime to think really deeply.
As for jason,
sorry i didn't know how to be a good stead in the past, so now i'm trying very hard to change.
i know you may not return back to my side, but no matter what u are still always in my heart.
sorry for being so selfish of me. i only think bout myself and neglected your feeling.
sorry for holding you back la, sorry for keep wanting you by my side, but not let you go to the one you really love. sorry.
i'm really sorry i dont know how to let go of you, and i know i cant too.
Wo zuo bu dao. dui bu qi. i only want you by my side to love you.

i felt lost amoung ppls. i no longer know who am i exactly anymore. i am no longer the girl i used to be. i am no longer the one who can always be happy no matter what. i want to give up on life. i am so useless of having all this kinds of thinking. i am stupid and selfish for wasting my mother's money.
i realise i am drifting more and more apart from this world. i am starting to fall deeper.. who can help me up?
i wan cut my hand siial seriously.
haix forget it i now wan go bath than go karaoke and sing my heart out le.
i'm left here all alone crying in the rain, and missing you in pain.
left speechless here by myself. with no one by my side.
i love you i really do.
wo fang bu xia ni. my life is nothing without you.

2009-10-15T22:25:00.000+08:00

Haix after so much?
what am i going to get in the end?
i really really very very tired i want give up leh.
i tried my best but my exam marks still like that.
friends ask me why i like not sad.
hmmm. let me ask u guys back.
how can i not be sad? but its life what? its retribution bah. maybe i not good enough thats why loh.
i did cry. but whats the use? i wont get more marks by crying anymore what?
just have to learn to accept it.
see now my studies no good. failure in life, relationship,friendship, failure in being a daughter too! haix D':
i just dont know what to do with myself.
hmmm. forget bout everything.
hmm you said, you felt like coming back to me.
but i wish its really true and i'm still waiting. i dont know, but i just want you by my side to cherish u, care for you, takecare of you and to love you.
the promises i made to you, i still remember and i still waiting to fufil the promise.
the flashback are just tearing me apart. and i cant get back up now. without you my life is shit.
thats all i can say.
I miss you, and i didn't know you miss me not? haixhaix. just what can i do now?
i really want to cry. hao lei hao lei.....
i just dono how to carry on with life like that. everyday is just to pain. everyday i just felt so weak. crying everyday. hypnotizing myself to sleep. crying so easily now. haix.
haix, i'm a total failure in relationship.
now i am also a failure of being a daughter.
Now the report is out, and mummy you have to go for operation.
i cant do anything here but being like a nerd a useless freak hoping everything would be fine, and nothing will happen.
see how useless i am.
Mummy, i love you.
promise me you will takecare kaes?
now i am left with nothing you are the only reason i can carry on because i dont want see u tears for me.
i know you did alot for me, but i'm sorry i didn't learn how to appreciate.
Tomorrow going work just because i want give u my pay. i know u suffered alot and its time i really did something for you.
Sorry for hurting you so much, so many times mummy.
Mummy, sorry for breaking promises so many times. i just cant concentrate on studies and i am a failure in it too. i'm sorry.

2009-10-13T22:56:00.003+08:00

without you my life just hasn't been the same.
i cant concentrAte on doing a single thing well.
E.G i can cut my hand while doing things not concentrating.
Why has things gone the other way round?
i'm missing you, baby i'm missing you so much D':
things will never be the same without you.
what did i do to deserve this?
i never even give u one last kiss D:
i guess i can no longer be strong anymore as i always am.
tears filled my eyes while reading the past message u sent me.
i need to feel you beside me. its really very warmth with you.
i would never feel cold with you.
i need to feel you holding me.
cause i miss your love so much.
and i cant keep carry on living this way.
i need you here with me.
why could u leave me because your heart is still there.
and i know i'll never hear your voice again.
why did you leave me?
why couldn't you just stay?
because my world is just simply nothing without you.
it turns meaningless and moodless.
now i dono what to do with myself.
i would have given u everything just to make u happy.
just to hear u say u love me one more time.
i would even give up my life just for you.
i have gotten held back times and times just to prove to you how much i love you how much i need you and care for you.
i cried for you, and lied for you.
i would rather give up my life than to see tears in your eyes.
haix.. i just wanted to show u how much i cared for you and how deep my love is for you..
cant you feel it? dont you appreciate it?
If you did why cant u be with me and move on happily?
life is filled with sorrows and tears.
trying to forget someone is just like trying to remember someone you never knew.
Something unpleasant happen today that really seriously effected me and my friend mood.
we were so worried over somethings but lucky everything is fine now.
we all need somebody to lean on and every other ones does have someone by their side why i am always the one who have it but just for a short while? D':
where can i turn to when you are all i ever wanted all i ever needed to move on and when the future has nothing for me to look forward to? haixhaix
my friends tell me to let go or at least give it a try. but what do i do when i start to cry? i'm holding you back but yet i didn't want to let go.
when you said you dont need me anymore i started crying again.
haix.. i'm real weak.
i sucks!
i know i have said goodbye for many times but all roads lead me back to you.
and the goodbye i have said made me have a feeling that i wont see you again.
haix i really miss you very much i need you.

2009-10-11T22:24:00.005+08:00

Moments we spent tgt and how longer we are together are just like sweet dreams, they will disappear once i have woken up. they would only last for a time of sweet dreams stays. i cant read ur text just once. whenever u touched me i thought i was just dreaming, i never thought i would ever felt this way. but now u're gone. i've never miss any one or love anyone this much i miss you. i still love you, i'm trying not to but i cant. we had couple of arguements but that only happens when we missed and loved each other so we always got bak together but this time it was diff, it seems like we have been apart for ages but its only been for weeks D': i guess i really misses u alot alot. even the hugs and kisses we had tgt. a song remind me of you. remember the time i layed on ur arms sharing the air inside one room. i didn't want to let go D': its so true when someone says you dont realise how much a person an mean to you till they're gone.. haix. All i can say is i still love you. if i were to given one thing, it will be you i wished for. everytime tears fall down my cheek i wished u were there so i could feel warmed. my like seems so empty without you, i wiish we still had what we did before and what we used to be like. i still love you i'm sorry i cant give up and stop loving you D: i'm sorry i still cant let go, cant stop thinking bout you D:
untill now i'm trying to hide my emotions and my sadness which filled me with tears in my eyes just because i didn't want you to worry. i dont want you to get stressed up and didn't want u to spoil ur mood or blame ur ownself. i just want you to be happy. i need you, i miss you, i love you, i want you. i made you my everything but u leave me, now i'm left with nothing already. i felt lost, i didn't know what to do i felt so tired, so xinku. i feel like giving up on life but i cant because i have given alot of ppls that i wont cut my hand and wont give up on my life. even though i already going to break down.. I dont want my everyday to be filled with unpleasant things D: i dont want to cry till sleep like this everyday. i just want ur sweet messages before i sleep, those warming words u said to me and u being by my side D:
sorry Jason i never seriously put everything down and move on happily like i told u i would D': i really tried but i realise i cant put down D':
you just meant too much to me like how she were to you. i just love you too much like how much u love her.
i want to cut my hand to release the pain i felt but i cant because i once promised u and alot more peoples haix sobsob D':

2009-10-11T14:25:00.000+08:00

After leaving me my life have changed.. my mood was like all screwed up. cant even cheer up even though i tried so hard. My life everyday just became so chui. everyday thinking you would return to my side one day? but, will u really? haix. can someone teach me how to cheer up? can i stand up from this fall again? i realised i still cant let go and still misses u and loving u alot alot. everyday crying and hypnotizing me to sleep. i felt so broody, and i just want u to help me up again. No matter what i am or anything, i still loved you still want to be by ur side cheering u up and loving you. haix.. why is this happening to me?
i shall post again at night bah. lend my bro use comp first bah.

2009-10-10T23:01:00.000+08:00

Today went get report.
doctor says its okays. my lungs are cleared and all kind of things. But whats the real reason behind my chest tightness and difficulties to breathing leh? i really dont know.
after checking went 216 market have my breakfast. finished le pei my grandma go change her clothes but the person no longer there anymore, wasted siial-.-
finish everything went 216 market buy my father de food and kopi le want go home but it started raining very heavily and i was all drenched-.- think after that caught a cold keep sneezing loh. wapiang!
hack care larhh, also nobody will care for me.. after resting awhile at grandma house than went home.. do a quick wash up and rot at home till 3 plus 4 plus go Ah Gu work place take Venus's present shunbian eat lunch than went back. lie down there wait for time passes. finally 6.50 le go Irene's house celebrate Venus's birthday loh.
quite bored, quite bo mood but still try to cheer up by singing karaoke lohh. than sing halfway cnt change song anymore-.- lame siial. TSK! bobian than never sing le loh. 10 than left and come back home..
Today is such a lame, bored, moodless, sad day...
i wonder how long i can stand all this.

2009-10-10T00:01:00.002+08:00

Today nothing talk about loh.
tell you the places i went today.
Bedok polyclinic-->tamp polyclinic-->jalan besar(mummy office)--> health promotion board level 3(child guildian clinic)-->tamp mall-->bedok(home).
it was rather tired today. the places i went today was like 90% unpleasant places.
Tomorrow still nid go bedok polyclinic and get my x-ray report.
i guess now he's at east coast having fun bah. hope he enjoy-ed and put away his stress and unpleasant moment for the moment bah. prayers for you always..
No matter how hard i work, how hard i change.. nothing will happens. but i still love you very very much.. i just want you to grab hold of me and never let go, just want to be by ur side loving you. but that will never happens. haix D': i wanna cry, wanna cut hand but i cant..
Now i can only love him secretly and wishing him all the best and wishes him happiness.
haix.. now suddenly chest pain again. just what exactly is happening?
Can anything me? no bah i guess?

Hurts that is there, its so unbearable.
But i am still trying to act happy, act normal.
Remember last time, no matter how sad am i how lonely am i, there's always someone who's there for me. atleast a counsellor, but now not even the counsellor can help me and all that the counsellor knows was to show me her fuckin ugly face and make me wanna puke.
i just want u here right next to me and wipe away my tears.

2009-10-06T14:27:00.004+08:00

and this is the grandpa i am always referring about. sorry for neglecting u in the past. i love you ah gong. although i wish that u would be here once again but i know it will never happens. but u will still be in my heart now and ever.

look at my baby fotos, i can actually smile with my teeth shown in the past. but now?
i cant even, i have lost all the happiness i used to have, i can see happiness i have in the past. but now i cant find any in my eyes. Mummy u are getting bias, everyone is neglecting me D:
Now only my ah kim(mummy's brother's wife) is there for me. only she understands how i feel. only she counsels me. only she supports me.
what can i do?
haix. i am still finding the happiness i lost since young haix.. i miss those times. no worries, no stress, no everythings, getting loved from everyone. everyone dotes me alot.
they says i'm guai in the past. they buy everythink i wants for me.
i want it all to come back to me, but thats definitly not happining ever again.
maybe what ah kim says is right.
what lost is lost. it will never be back. i'm a soreloser.
ah kim thanks for being by my side always:D

2009-10-06T10:57:00.009+08:00

if you really love ur stead so much and cant forget her, than wait for her and return back to her side bah. i will support u no matter what de. i think thats the only think i can do bah.
jiayous and good luck than. do ur best and win back her heart bah.
thanks for being my stead once, thanks for being with me.
thanks for having u by side even if its only 1 month 1 day.
thanks for the memories.
thanks for everythink u have given to me.
really hope we could be like last time, but i know there's no chance anymore.
i just have to learn to let go.
Thinking whether if i could go ecp once more and go deep into the sea? or stand in the middle of park way NTUC there de road again? can i cut my hand once more?
why do i have to always play the role whereby i'm always the one who have to let go, but not the one who can hold on tighly, who can hold on long enough?
why cant i have a proper long lasting relationship?
theres no one to fufill this wish of mine D:
when someone tries to tie another one by his/her side, the person will only be leaving in the end. when u want to really love someone peacefully, theres always obstacles end up coming in the end. Xiang Yao zhen zhen de ai yi ge ren zhen de hao tao ku hao lei hao lei ah. wo ke yi ting zai zhe li,
everything also don care and just leave ma? its just to pain.. just too tired.
haix,
i'm left with nothing now.
everyday de laughter everyday de jokes, are all lame excuse for me to hide my problems away fromm friends.
cant u guys see that the sound the tone that i am using is so fake?
but you guys just cant spot it. nehmind, your're are not to be blame, its my fault. i should take the blame i should be taking responsiblity myself.
i'm just running away from my problem, but can i hide forever?
haix, now headache. dont want talk le. maybe at night than post again bah...
you left me speechless here, u took my breathe away and now u are returning back to me. you are once mine but now you're gone forever. you took my heart away and now u are pushing it away, it hurts. my heart is bleeding profusely now. Today do exam half way cant breathe, is like real needles poking through so i lied on the table while doing my maths exam. i think i will failed it? but if i am lucky? i wont bah.
you wont return back to my side and thats for truth there's nothing i can do nor say to keep u here now.
felt hurt, felt so tired, can i give up?
i am changing real hard but end up like that. haix i think there's no need to change anymore.
have u ever really love me? have u ever appreciate me? i trust that you have, because i dont want anythink happens. whatever happens just promise me u wont do anything silly and wont be sad bah.
i may not play the role who can take care of you anymore le.
i may be leaving real soon. it hurts to see u leaving. but i have to accept it..... ARGH!!!!!! i go bang head sua..
and mummy you're right.
i'm not responsible enough for my belongings, i lost everythink and because of my irresponsible-ness i lost him too.

2009-10-04T22:31:00.003+08:00

thanks for forgiving yourself atleast.
but i still hope u could come back to me loh D:
haix.
爱一个人好难..
crying hard for your return but i know you will never jio me again.
他霸占了你的心中屬於我的角落
所以你說我們不是你和我
是我想太多你總這樣說
但你確沒有真的心疼我
是我想太多我也這樣說
這是為了安慰我的理由
我想我沒有錯怪了什麼
雖然你不說都是錯在我
太晚我才懂愛了你太多.
i dont know whether you will come back to me one day and jio me back not, but
i really hope it will happens.
no matter how far u are or where you are my heart still cant leave u.
i dont know what you said is true anot but i choose to belive.
i believe choosing to wait for you and to hold on to you is a right choice, and i wont regret it.
From the start u knew that you are a good guy. but after somethings that happens made u become like that.
haix,
will u really come back?
will u really listen?
i trust you and i have faith in you.
i believe u will change.
what you told me ytd shall be kept inside my mind forever.
i will change more brave i will really give in my best shoot,
But do i really gonna have a chance to change for you again?
i may not be able to be in this world so long le.
i decided to really go for a tougher health check up le,
whether or not the report is positive or negative i still dont have a choice.
and have to accept it.
"choichoichoi la" touchwood loh...
if that's what god wants my life to be it also cant be help.
P.S i just want to love someone and be his stead peacefully and i think there's nth wrong with it
jason loh u must takecare and change ok?
i know what u said was just to cheer me up.
maybe there's still hope? maybe there's no more?
i will still accept it. although its really unbearable.
i just want to tell u my love will never change, i will always be there for you whenever u need someone to lend u a shoulder to cry on. i still miss you and love you. this is for the last time i tell u this, but the concept, the thinking will always be in mind la. i will always think the same way.
i always believe a couple who is tgt happily is always a blessing, and a fate.
i just hope everyone could be happy, could be good in all sense of way.
i hope u will read this post loh.
haix.
i'm and leaving with speechless mood.
letting go of you is totally impossible to me, and its rather painful. those memories, those miss and those times were tearing me apart. how can i hope when everything is hopeless?
we're drifting, but i hope we are not.
ur love for me is fading, but i hope its not.
u're changing, but i'm hoping that you would not change.
i shall end my post by part of a song de lyrics bah:
不管相见的夜多么难堪
简简单单的说爱是不爱
想要把你忘记真的好难
思念的痛在我心里纠缠
朝朝暮暮的期盼
永远没有答案
为何当初你选择一刀两断
听你说声爱我真的好难
曾经说过的话风吹云散
站在天平的两端一样的为难
唯一的答案
爱一个人好难

2009-10-04T18:27:00.010+08:00

Haix i dono what happen, went meet TengTeng take lit book than keep thinking, keep got flashbacks. suddenly headache, head spinning. than went home, sick le loh. got tuition @ 2.45 end up become 3.30-.- tuition totally no mood study plus my head keep spinning. blurblur de cant concentrate nor think how to do all the maths ques. end up all wrong. haix. i dono what to do now. No appetite to eat but still have to. but eat untill wan vomit D:
i miss you, i love you.
i dont want flashbacks to keep coming into my mind but i want you but my side giving me what the flashbacks shows D':
can you come back to me?
i need you D':
i realised i still cant let go of u D:
i want you all by my side D:
i will wait for you no matter what D:
i missed the way we kiss,
miss the times where we cared for each other,
miss the time where we held our hands walking on streets,
miss the time when we sweet talks and when we were sharing jokes,
miss the time when i sat beside you,
miss the time when i stared at you,
miss the time when u played piano for me to listen
miss the time when we shared the air inside one room tgt
i just simply miss everything that we did tgt D:
why did you have to leave me all alone here by myself? D':
don leave me please D':
can i cut my hand? D':

2009-10-03T23:15:00.004+08:00

ok, ytd 2 plusplus 3 like that cry untill sleep than today 9 plus wake up.
i know there's nth i could do to get u back by my side ever again. but i still love you still want you so much.
flashback of us tgt keep flashing. today 2 plus met tengteng to go inter walkwalk try let off the sad. but totally bo mood, than i jiu sent her off to mrt station control and i solo-ed home, on bus i past by bus 196 there haix, the flashback of we two there comes into my mind again. it really saddens me to see u leaving me.
And all i could think about is you. everyday i close my eyes i see ur face appearing. bi why cant u come back to me? why cant u love me anymore?
i still care for you alright? i still misses you D: my love for you will never be erased away and will never be replaced D:
i missed the way you say you love me too,
miss the you look at me in your eyes,
miss the way you held my hand tightly in your hand,
miss the way we kisses for long hours,
miss the way i being shy infront of you,
miss the way you huged me and i huged u back,
i just miss every single time with you.
i really really hope to get u back by my side again.
i really want to wait for you.
you meant so much to me.
day had passes so slowly and lonely without you by my side.
I felt so painfull that i could hardly breathe without you.
i sang my heart out today at the karaoke session. everyone was stun cause i just boost and sang while ppl sang so little times.
and now no mood as i misses you alot alot.
the things you do just made me happy without you even tryin to.
i can smile and laugh on fone and when i'm with you,
but without you i cant even smile and laugh, infect i cry.
guess what? the songs i sang just now was all sad songs. haixhaix,
i miss you so much bi.
the promises you made, i am still waiting.
the swearing of not leaving me but loving me and only me, i'm still waiting D:
i read your msg everyday now. i read every min every sec not wanting to delete it away and as i read i want to cry more. i was like crazy when i accidently press delete but heng can reject deleting, if anyone dares to delete any of your msg i really will kill that person loh. haix. how i wish those msg cant stop coming in.
how i wish those days we spent tgt just wont go.
can i have you back by my side?
can i wait for the day when u come back to me and ask me for stead again?

2009-10-03T12:38:00.003+08:00

"GOOD" loh now-.-
relationship no more thn nw quarrel with father again wah.
puacheebye! kanina. gimme your fuckin attitude for what?!
you my father so what dua i scared u uh? nabei. see u old nia siial.
everything is so gampua sucks! i hate life, fuck-tard la, fucking cheebye.
AH.
this post let me scold all vulgarities please.
forgive me for the vulgarities anw.
CHEEBYE, FUCKER, KANINA BEI, PUABYE, PUALAN, PUA CHEE BYE, LANLAN, PUBOR, BASTARD, NABEI,FUCK OFF, GAM LAN, HONGKAN, LANJIAO! BLODDY HELL, BLOODY IDIOT, BLOODY BASTARD, BLOODY CHEEBYE!CHEENA! ARGH! I CANT STAND EVERYTHING LE LA. CAN I DONT ACT OUT FAKE EMOTIONS? CAN I JUST SHOW OUT MY EMOTIONS? CAN I CRY? CAN I CUT MY HANDS?!?!?!?!?!
CAN I BANG WALL? CAN I DIE? CAN I JUMP DOWN THE BUILDING? CAN I FALL DOWN THE STAIRS? CAN I GO INTO THE DEEP SEE AND DROWN TILL DEATH?!
AIYA CHEEBYE LA. FUCKING PISSED OFF.
HATE MY FAMILY HATE LIFE HATE STUDIES HATE EVERYTHING!
EVERYTHING IS A PIECE OF SHIT. I THINK I COMFIRM FAIL END OF YEAR EXAM DE. NO MOOD STUDY AT ALL. NO MOOD DO ANYTHING.

2009-10-03T11:53:00.005+08:00

are you just using me to forget her?
it really hurts me know?
i tried my best but still i cant help anything.
and everything just comes to an end just like that.
i am really tired.
now that you leave me alone here all by my ownself.
u broke one promise.
everyday is so tired and so hurtfull for me to carry on.
can i stop here just like that.
and put a very full stop to my life and end it here.
cant stand being awake everyday, cause the pain is just too much for life to goes on.
am i just a toy for every stead of my i had in the past? am i just a girl for u all to use to forget ur ex? is it tht fun to do so?
everytime i put my heart and soul into a relationship, everytime i tried my best to be a good stead, everytime i do a good thing i will have this kinds of hurtfull endings.
can i do good things and have good endings? i guess i dont.
i decided to stay single from now onwards than. so freaking tired, so freaking gampua hurt.
no one will really treat me seriously no one will really treasure me or appreciate me. i'm nothing.
And now after i waited 2 years i finally got u here by my side but now i had still lost u at the very end.
Now i know u will never return to my side anymore. it really pains me.
why did you make me fall in love with you?
and its for so long.
why did you do things to make me fall deeper and deeper in love with you for everyday i spent everytime we are tgt.
why did you want to make promises to me?
why?why?why?
i just want to love someone peacefully like that also got wrong?
i just want a long term relationship this also got wrong?
Now that i'm hurt, the hurt will always be there.
A scar is still a scar. it will never be erase but the times we spent tgt will still be in my mind. thanks for the memories.
Those promises you made to me are just simply empty promises that will not be fufill.
BYES~!
and off i go to cry.
friends dont worry ok?
i am used to getting hurt now.

2009-10-03T11:01:00.002+08:00

"give me more lovin then i’ve ever had.
make it all better when i’m feelin sad.
tell me that i’m special even when i know i’m not.
make me feel good when i hurt so bad."
by 1 2 3 4, Plain White T’s (via kari-shma)

"give me more lovin from the very start.
piece me back together when i fall apart.
tell me things you never even tell your closest friends.
make me feel good when i hurt so bad."
by 1 2 3 4, Plain White T’s (via kari-shma)

"Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself. To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night. To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving."
by Kahlil Gibran (via kari-shma)

"

I never thought I’d be in love like this …
When I look at you my mind goes on a trip
And you came in .. and knocked me on my face
Feels like I’m in a race .. and I already won first place

I never thought I’d.. fall for you as hard as I did
You got me thinkin’ about our life a house and kids
Every mornin’ I look at you and smile
Cause boy you came around and you knocked me down.. knocked me down

Sometimes love comes around
And it knocks you down
Just get back up"
by knock you down-keri hilson

"He who spends time regretting the past loses the present and risks the future."
Quevedo (via bitchville)

"I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much."
by Unknown (via brokenmachine)

"There are only two roads that lead to something like human happiness. They are marked by the words … love and achievement… . In order to be happy oneself it is necessary to make at least one other person happy… . The secret of human happiness is not in self-seeking but in self-forgetting."
by Dr. Theodor Reik (via calidre)

"Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious,
you’re not really losing it. You’re just passing it on."
by The Five People You Meet in Heaven (via gatekeeper)

"Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another."
by Marquis de Condorcet (via bitchville)

if its the thought that counts,
you can count on me.
i think bout you all the time.

"You know the thing about romance is people only get together right at the very end."

by Sam (Thomas Sangster), Love Actually (via eunichick)

"You are the only person that can make my heart beat faster and slower at the same time."

by The Hot Chick (via julie911)
"They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself"

by Andy Warhol (via yearslater)

"I may be sleeping
but I still feel your kisses
across my forehead."

by Daily Haiku on Love by Tyler Knott Gregson (via tylerknott)

"Sometimes it seems the harder you try to hold on to something or someone the more it wants to get away. You feel like some kind of criminal for having felt, for having wanted. For having wanted to be wanted. It confuses you, because you think that your feelings were wrong, and it makes you feel so small because it’s so hard to keep it inside when you let it out and it doesn’t come back. You’re left so alone that you can’t explain."

by Henry Rollins (via brokenmachine)

"Sometimes, no matter how much faith we have, we lose people. But you never forget them. And sometimes, it’s those memories that give us the faith to go on."

by Unknown (via brokenmachine)

"When we direct our thoughts properly, we can control our emotions…"

W. Clement Stone

note to self.

(via kari-shma)

All those arrows you threw, you threw them away
You kept falling in love, then one day
When you fell, you fell towards me
When you crashed in the clouds, you found me

Oh, please don’t go
I want you so
I can’t let go
For I lose control

Get these left handed lovers out of your way
They look hopeful but you, you should not stay
If you want me to break down and give you the keys
I can do that but I can’t let you leave

Oh, please don’t go
I want you so
I can’t let go
For I lose control

"

Please don’t go, Barcelona. (via kari-shma)

"My mom always told me to remember the three L’s; Live, laugh and love. She always asked me which was most important and I would say live because if you don’t live, then you can’t laugh or love. However, she was always there to correct me and tell me love was the most important and that’s because if you never find love, you’ll never fully laugh or never completely understand living."

Unknown (via thresca)

"Before I met you
I was me, but not the me
I knew I could be."

Daily Haiku on Love by Tyler Knott Gregson (via tylerknott)

"There’s a certain kind of pain that can numb you. There’s a type of freedom that can tie you down. Sometimes the unexplained can define you. And sometimes the silence is the only sound. In the book of life, the answers aren’t in the back."

~ Charlie Brown (via gatekeeper)

"If only given
four words to say they would be
Thanks For Loving Me."

Daily Haiku on Love by Tyler Knott Gregson (via tylerknott)

"What I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you."

V for Vendetta (via gatekeeper)

2009-10-02T23:45:00.010+08:00

"Love is never convenient-and rarely painless."
by Richard Paul Evans (The Sunflower) (via thresca)
"When you lose everything you want, you find everything you need."
by Unknown (via thresca)

After so long, i finally got my answer. so, everything was just an illusion-.- sweet days just passes by so quickly. haix. i have done all that i needed to do, and so this is what i get. so be it-.- freaking tired.. untill today i breakdown and cry all i want. am i predestined to be single forever? am i predestined to have shorts relationship with the person i truely love?
frankly speaking u're the one i love the most.
the first one i officially kissed,
the first one i officially hugged,
the first one i lie on your chest,
the first one i really missed alot just after one turned of my face away,
the first one i cried so badly for,
the first one i really wish to be forever and ever of my life.
But till now? everything seems to be like to an end.
Haix, i still love you as much as i always do but i cant bare to see ur mood like keep getting so screwed up. although i felt so hurt but still i have to leave.
although i still wan u by my side by still i cant have u.
i admit i lost. i admit i am childish. i admit everything.
thanks for everything that you have given me. it will always stay in my heart.
you will still always be in my heart now and ever, i only want you to be happy thats all. am i asking for too much?
我只想好好的爱你,难到这样做也错吗?我只想和你生活再一起,只想你快乐, 难到也错? 那你能告诉我应该怎么做吗?
i miss your voice your face your everything, but i still had to let go.
i miss you but we cant meet up anylonger.
we cant go out holding hands anymore D:
why is everything like this?
haix i am so sick and tired of everything. today shall not sleep and concentrate and crying bah.
haixhaix. suck a total useless freak i am.
everything do also not good.
everything also shy-.-
i regretted forgetting to take pic with you on the first month anniversary. if i have at least i still can see ur face on pic.
but now i cant anymore. haix, i am so tired. i want to give up.
where are all the promises we have made?
i dont want do end of year exam anymore.
felt like cutting hand again siial-.-
"After all these months, I never stopped hoping that you’d come back, but I did stop expecting it. Having your breath freeze up every time the doorbell chimes or the phone rings takes its toll on a person, and whether it’s conscious or not, you eventually make the decision to divide your life in half – before and after – with loss being that tight bubble in the middle. You can move around in spite of it; you can laugh and smile and carry on with your life, but all it takes is one slow range of a motion, a doubling over, to be fully aware of the empty space at your center."
by Jodi Picoult (via skyisland)

"You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you"
by Mr. Darcy, Pride & Prejudice (via betterthanfine)

2009-10-01T22:23:00.002+08:00

Firstly, today is the first month anniversary of Yeo Shu Hui(me) and Jason Loh Zhi Feng. happy first month anniversary bi!:D
secondly, today is the first day of Tengteng with another guy! congrats! i'm happy for you :D
thirdly, i wanna thanks bi for the giving in to me for the past one month thanks for forgiving, thanks for loving me, thanks for everything you have given me. i'm happy to have you all by my side!:D i love you bi<3
lastly, it was such a waste that me and bi have forgotten to take pic tgt D: but nehmind maybe tmr bah(:

2009-09-30T22:17:00.005+08:00

Today geog gone case le. i have got no mood loh. do untill wan cry but cant. haix that kind of feelings really sucks.
haix, tomorrow eng oral hope i can do it well enough to pull my subject upright.
i have no confidence that i will go up to sec 3. phobia.
my mood was screwed up after today no mood to study for other sub anymore D':
sorry mummy i failed you. sorry everyone i failed you guys D:
thanks anw to those who had been there for me when i need someone to talk to(:

haix, why is the feeling i felt getting stronger and stronger,
really really hope it will not goes the way i think please.
i really dont want what happen in the past to happens twice.

2009-09-29T22:43:00.004+08:00

Today woke up at 7.27am caused too cold the air-con, off-ed the fan and went back to sleep. 9 plus than wake up.. quickly eat my breakfast, shower and went school. Thought i was late therefore took cab there reached school it was only 10.20a.m.. Lame, make me waste money siial. stupid.
Oral was still ok but i said english word siial hehes. so paiseh loh dono what to say so use eng. was the first one to finish, followed by LeTing. decided where to go so left school and went home to prepare. i faster shower and left home to UOB help my father do payment. met LeTing at bedok MRT station control and went bugis library. Went arcade play some games to boost our energy than went bugis library Cant find our way loh.. hahas end up reach le we dono where is where therefore we took a map of the library. XIASUAY siial.. went to B1 study but didn't have the mood to study but still study awhile narh. After that went walkwalk and played arcade once again. Caught two soft toy! it was so cute loh!:D mrt-ed back to bedok.. on the way had so much fun loh. kept laughing.
reach bedok we decided to go NTUC walkwalk awhile than bus-ed home. hahas something funny happened. i took the table tennis ball and play with it end up flying down to the first floor hahas so XIASUAY! nearly shoot one person's head loh. we laughed all the way till we have no more strength to even walked. after that quickly ran down and took the ball back to its original place. went TO bedok inter de hawker centre buy LeTing's ORH LUA and 222-ed back home!:D
thats all for today!:DD

i'm awaiting for THURSDAY!:D

2009-09-28T20:55:00.006+08:00

three weeks didn't meet bi le, and its all my fault.
cause i nid study nid mug, cause i got those stupid party stuff.
when He's sick but i'm not there for him i'm sorry bi D:
sometimes or shall i put it this way most of the time i really felt useless.
i'm so afraid we will be driting apart from each other and slowly losing you slowly day by day as time passes by.
is there anything i can do to bring our relationship closer?
I miss you bi! D':
i know i'm selfish but i wan u to belong to me, just me. the one and only me.
i wan your heart to be with me all the times.
haix..
i'm loving you more and more as each day passes by.
Want you to be by my side everyday of life. every second, every min, every hour, every day, every week, every month, and as well as every year D:
Now i'm trying to stop the all the acts of my childishness which causes our quarrels.
Friends has been telling me i kept my boyfriend at a very high position in my heart, even my mother i didn't cared her as much as i cared my boyfriend. its true, i'm sorry but i cant help, i cant help but falling deeper and deeper in love with my boyfriend.
i treat every boyfriend seriously. i am also treating them with extra loves and extra cares. but whenever he's sick i cant be there for him i felt very useless very sad and infect very heartache as well. i am learning to be a good stead,learning to be a good caregiver. Are u willing to give me that chance to learnt how to be a good stead?

2009-09-27T11:24:00.002+08:00

everynight i find it so hard to sleep,
cause i keep thinking of you,
all these feeling from me,
oh baby i tried to hide all these feelings for you,
i kept them bottled inside,
i dont know what else to do, so i cry,
when nobody hears me, i cry
its my only solution, i cry
to all this confusion, i cry
with all of my heart, i cry
sometimes i wonder in a blink of an eye
would you be willing to love me?
would you give it a try?
i dont know how as to show you that our love could be real.
i'll be eternity faithful, forever i feel, so i cry.
but nobody hears me, i cry
its my only solution, i cry.
To all this confusion, i cry.
with all of my heart.

2009-09-27T10:55:00.002+08:00

another day without your smile,
another day just passes by,
but now i know how much it meant,
for you to stay right here with me.
and time we spent apart,
will make our love grow stronger,
but it hurts so bad i cant take any longer,
i wanna grow old with you,
i wanna die lying in your arms,
i wanna grow with you,
i wanna be looking in your eyes,
i wanna be there for you,
sharing everything you do,
i wanna grow old with you,
thousand miles between a smile,
it causes me to wonder how,
our love tonight remains so strong,
it makes our risk right along,
and time we spent apart wwill make our love grow stronger,
but it hurts so bad i cant take it any longer,
i wanna grow old with you,
i wanna die lying in your arms,
i wanna grow with you,
i wanna be looking in your eyes,
i wanna be there with you,
sharing everything you do,
i wanna grow old with you,
things can come and go i know but,
baby i believe,
somethings burning strong between us,
makes it clear to me,
i wanna grow old with you,
i wanna die lying in your arm,
i wanna grow old with you,
i wanna be looking in your eyes,
i wanna be there for you,
sharing everything you do,
i wanna grow old with you,
i wanna die lying in your arms,
i wanna grow old with you,
i wanna be looking in your eyes,
i wanna be there for you,
sharing everything you do,
i wanna grow old with you.

2009-09-25T22:28:00.001+08:00

This few days quite moody narh. also dono why.
think because keep thinking bout the chest pain thingy quite worried bout it loh.
yesterday mass exercise, The stupid ran thingy 7 rounds this time-,-
this time 2 rounds expected to ran for 7 mins, and another 5 rounds in 20min-.-
nearly faint.. got suddenly black out awhile but still must chiong still must ran cause MRS TIU don believe my chest pain cant breathe cause got no doctor's letter-.-
than today whole day muscle cramp.. than so moody, do DNT hammer the nail. hammer till my hand, wah pain siiol. lol nehmind continue do do do. very pekcek siial so bored de loh. do the stupid acrylic thingy keep break wah bloody hell siial.
thn after that do last time finally can than brk again wah dulan so use glue.
recess went canteen drink lemon tea as usual and the same old food.
LeTing today never come. I so bored. nobody to joke with loh.
after school detention few mins nia loh. than left le(:
than went LeTing house give her consent form, thn went TengTeng house, waited for her bath after that went my house my turn. LOL hahas, quite fun neh today..
But the most sad things is i cannot meet bi D:
nehmind 1oct meeting him no matter what!:D
I LOVE YOU BI! <33

2009-09-23T22:17:00.004+08:00

[yesterday]
ytd went school nearly late but never.. heng-.-
LOL! CME lesson, found out one of my schoolmate just pass-ed away.
from sec 4N6 although i didn't know who he is but i felt quite sad narh..
he died of brain tumour last stage. haix.. life is filled with ups and downs, we cant take things for granted. learnt to give and take, treasure our love onces and not wait till u lost them than u regret alright? Haix, going to see doctor on saturday cause of the chest pain and the tighten of chest thing. hope everything will be alright..
[Today]
woke up at 5.30+++ shower, dry hair jiu prepare went school le,
nearly late because didn't estimate the time i nid to take to reach school.
Reach school it was about 7.11+++ i think.. not much to talk about in school de.. jiu rot nia loh.. slept during lesson cause no heart listen.
Geog lesson Fiona was not feeling well so me and LeTing sent her down to the care and concern room loh.. hope she's fine now(: than chinese lesson got test do liao jiu sleep all the way till 12.50p.m after that went science lesson.. blabla jiu end le.. today ate alot of sweets loh..
LOL! later tooth decay.. after school cab-ed down to tamp mall cause lazy squeeze in the bus with ppls. wanted to vomit.. not feeling quite well but after a moment it was back to normal le(: eat lunch with LeTing we did something gross to the left over foods than saw FangTing suan-ed him than me and LeTing went window shopping jiu went home le..
nothing much today loh.

Bi, every single little bit of things i did is just to keep you by my side.
And holding on to you tightly is because i'm afraid of losing you.
If i were to do things over the line please forgive me..
And the songs u dedicate to me thanks. its very sweet(:
I love you just the way you are,
The way we chat on phone,
The way we walked on street when every other ones are looking,
The way we were kissing,
The way we hug each other tightly and dont want to let go,
The way we cared for our relationship,
The way our hand were held tightly.
I just love the ways it is.
I'll try my best and keep away quarrels between us de(:
Will treasure and love you with my heart and soul just the way i am now<33>

2009-09-21T21:08:00.003+08:00

today woke up at 11 plusplusplus morning so late hoh? sorry norh i slept at 2 plus midnight mah.
after that i message bi he forgiven me le(: so good hoh. hehes!:D love him forever narh<33
eat my lunch and shower-ed wait for tuition teacher than so long than come-.-
tuitiontuition finish LeTing says she very boring than after that i end tuition i jio her and TengTeng out loh. to bugis..
tuition end 3.00 than meet them @3.45..
i reached library outside at 3.45 than after they drag here drag there already 4 plusplus le loh.. but nehmind larh cause last min de marh..
went bugis junction play arcade see see like nothing play so went iluma de arcade play loh.
so fun siial!^^
play the big sweet land untill so agitated hahas.. everybody looking at us loh..
we playplayplay end up tio the jackpot siial! so lucky! hahas:D
after that went 7th floor play the arcade.. so little variety but still fun narh.. we three played the basketball de.. play untill like siao anyhow throw end up the basketball keep fly here fly there loh. hahas everybody look at us.. end up the counter de ppl also wan come find us.. hahas
Promised LeTing say nxt time free go again:D she say next time go play again than after go airport slack.. than i say steady loh. next time loh.
after end of year bah:DDD
hmmm.. when can i meet my bi? i miss him so much neh D:
Sobs!D': what happen ytd bi forgive me le but got punishment.. and i say ok loh:D hehes..
wont make the same mistake again le..
but hope after all those argues and quarrels we will slowly get closers kaeS?

2009-09-21T00:14:00.002+08:00

sorry for me thinking so much.
untill today i understand everything.
thanks anw for the intro of family.
thanks for the happiness u created in my life,
i'm sorry for all the nuisance i have made.
i still love you of all..
hope u can forgive me for my childsishness.
its really time for me to be mature.
STOP THINKING SO MUCH SHUHUI, AND START BEING OPTIMISTIC(:
now i wont think so much but forcus on loving you and moving on with you narh.
don angry le kaes?
i promise i'll change i really will.

2009-09-20T22:34:00.003+08:00

i no longer have confidence in myself.
times and time, the same things has been happening on me..
so tired. just what did i do for the rest of my life to deserve all this things?
i really wonder, what am i to you? am i just a toy, a subsitute for you to forget ur ex or just a responsibility for you to hold?
what did i do wrong, that you have to treat me with such a cold attitude?
i know i'm not as good as her.. but also no nid treat me liddat mah..
cann someone tell me what to do? i cant do anything right now. felt so helpless.
can i just give up on everything instead of getting all this stuff from happening?
is there anything i can do, for u to really forget bout her?
i know i can never replace her in your heart.
i know i am selfish to have you by my side when ur heart is not with me..
but i seriously cant control my emotions.. cant control this things from happening mah..
can i just restart anything?
if i were to have another second chance i would choose not to come to this crucial world and get treated in this all kinds of ways.
Mummy, thank you for giving birth to me after 10 months of suffering.
i have failed u i'm sorry..
sorry for disobeying you all this while.
you stand by me when i have troubles you console me when i'm unhappy. thank you,
i said u didn't care bout me and love brother more. for that i apologise.
sorry for all the unhappiness i created for you..
sorry for making u worry and cry when u're working..
i didn't know how to control my emotions..
i'm learning and i'm trying but its very tiring i wish i could stop functioning.
i tried to teach brother in his studies to help u reduce abit of ur stress but i failed.. i'm sorry
you spent money for me to have tuition, but i didn't appreciate i'm sorry..
i'm not a good daughter, not a good friend, not a good sister, not a good grand daughter nor a good stead.
i don deserve to be love, i don deserve to love someone.
can i just stop everything here?
please. i really had enough hurt, enough of all those unforgetting of stead and stuffs things..
i failed you guys i'm sorry, i cant overcome myself.
can i just go somewhere else where no one else will be there.
i wan to be alone but i'm afraid of darkness, afraid of loneliness.
i sucks, i am sick and tired of acting as if i am happy when i'm not really happy.
can someone talk to me and go ecp to release stress with me?
can i return to the past where you are friendly and loving?
can i change you? i dont think i even have the rights to.
there's nothing i can do to help you. i'm sorry

felt like cutting my hand, but can i?

no i cant

felt like crying, but can i?

no i cant

felt like giving up, but can i?

no i cant.

haix, i have come to a fullstop,

i'll stop functioning from now onwards.

i don really have someone there loving me just the right way.

i dont have someone who really cares bout me..

why is this so?

because i sucks bah i think.

i'm bad in everything i does.

2009-09-20T15:13:00.005+08:00

currently don have the mood,

and listening to the song

"歌曲:绝口不提爱你"

闭上眼睛忍住呼吸

暂时要和世界脱离

就快要学会不再想你

却听见不断跳动的心

我允许了你

让爱的自由还给你

我允许了自己

承受这悲伤到天明

我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许

我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提

总是以为终究化作云淡风轻

爱你到底痛了自己

我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许

我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提

所有结局在这夜里都已成形

爱到了底痛的是我的真心

闭上眼睛忍住呼吸

暂时要和世界脱离

就快要学会不再想你

却听见不断跳动的心

我允许了你

让爱的自由还给你

我允许了自己承受这悲伤到天明

我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许

我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提

总是以为终究化作云淡风轻

爱你到底痛了自己

我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许

我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提

所有结局在这夜里都已成形

爱到了底痛的是我的真心

所有结局在这夜里都已成形

爱到了底痛的是我的真心

END

2009-09-20T11:03:00.006+08:00

Ytd went wedding dinner.. after that blablabla and so and so for..
went home message him say this say that. what he still cant forget his ex, the ex still stand quite a big place in his heart.. aiya i dono la.. fuckin bo mood loh. didn't sleep till 4 plus 5 liddat.. i dono how to continue this way siial.. can someone tell me what to do or help me with all this probs?
today, i found out i'm nothing but just a burden. a responsibility for u to hold. i'm sorry bout that. i didn't meant it.. if u were to tell me earlier, than i will not be ur burden for so long.

[i'll be there for you]

I guess this time you're really leaving
I heard your suitcase say goodbye
Well as my broken heart lies bleeding
You say true love, it’s suicide
You say you've cried a thousand rivers
And now you're swimming for the shore
You left me drowning in my tears
And you won't save me anymore.
And you won't save me anymore
I pray to God you'll give me one more chance
I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you
I know you know we're had some good times
Now they have their own hiding place
I can’t promise you tomorrow
But I can't buy back yesterday
And Baby you know my hands are dirty
But I wanted to be your valentine
I'll be the water when you get thirsty, baby
When you get drunk, I'll be the wine
I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you
And I wasn't there when you were happy
I wasn't there when you were down
I didn't mean to miss your birthday
I wish I'd seen you blow those candles out
I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you
I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you

END

didn't know what to react.

didn't know what to do.

didn't know how to work it out.

i really felt so hopeless.

so speechless.

so depressed.

how can this relationship last any longer like that?

how can you keep the promises like that.

you dont have to be with me just because of respoinsibility,

because in the end non of us will be happy.

if u really love her than just return to her side.

no point to continue this relationship if your heart is just not there.

and when the feeling is just not there.

perhaps u can say i am too serious bout it le.

but its very hard for me to accept the fact la.

that day u told me there's something bothering u but u didn't know what is the matter.

but for the fact, is u have the flashbacks of u and ur ex thats why u didn't have the mood right?

i'm nothing but a piece of shit la,

so no point caring bout this idiot me over here. just hack care me and go.

2009-09-18T23:37:00.003+08:00

Today woke up at 6.50a.m wah nearly late. all the way chiong to school. heng never late. than first period DNT scared loh dont dare do the sanding work.. and blablabla.. after that recess bought lemon tea and left it unclose on the table, than playing with leting suddenly Darren go disturb her and touch her face like wan slap her but it was a prank hahas. that after he left i disturb her back than she wan revenge end up is the whole lemon tea on my body. wah i shout like fuck siial hahas. so sad norh had to ren untill after school go home bath.. walk-ed home with LeTing were joking here and there it was fun(: sent her home and i solo-ed all the way.. reached home cook porridge and eat.. eat quite fast than went bath le jiu left house to go bi house. went half way found out umbrella spoiled so went grandma house change smaller de and good de.. mrt-ed to lavender to meet bi.. so slow loh bi, he slow pig =P he will kill me if he sees this:D
he finally reached than headed to his house wah so near the mrt nia loh.. on the way there so scared siial. thinking if his parents fierce not.. hahas! but end up it turn out to be friendly(:
he played piano for me siiol. so sweet!:$ than hughug and muackmuack. hehs so paisehh siial.. i shy till diam diao loh.. than after he suan me bout the lemon tea thing wah than more paiseh.. i think my face was damn red that time loh. wah his air-con so cold loh x.x BRRRRRR.... freeze liao loh.. than look at my clock 6 liao.. the parents actually asked me to stay for dinner de but too bad got smth on =P than bi sent me to the mrt.. smth farni happen! hahas! guess what? we both blurblur never see the buy ticket machine says only accept 5 or 2 bucks than keep insert 10 bucks hahas.. than cannot go in.. bi end up scolding the machine hahas. so funny loh.. after that i saw it he say i didnt tell him.. actually i also dono loh.. if not i wont be so retard standing there keep trying loh..
end up bi used two piece of 2 bucks to buy than i owned him loh, pay him next time!:D got interest de siial.. 10X more leh.. so cannot drag longlong..
ok next week start bi jiu school holiday le so can meet manymany times yipee!^^
hahas, shall end the post here bah.. go back msn chat with my bi bah:D
love you bi,
i miss you!:D

2009-09-17T22:51:00.002+08:00

Today woke up at 6.29a.m ytd slept at 3.30+++ tired loh D:
after that went school nearly late but never. heng loh.
Eng lesson was damn fun today, the teacher crazy de. kpkb everything also she says. LOL say if you wan do the eng worksheet than do dont want jiu pass down the paper, so me and my friends didn't take. than after that she shout why arent you doing?! where's your paper? and blablabla.. she shouted and KIM BEE HOON than he shouted back hahas.. than do indian dance give her see.. LAUGH NON STOP LOH.. so we were like disturbing her and so on so for.. after that we keep joke bout her say her butt smelly all that.. laugh like hell..
after that art MR. TOCK says that i am siao zhabor-.- LOL! i don give a DAMN.
M.E lesson, tio baotoh dono who the fuck go say i have HNF than ask me go infront.. end up actually don have my name, i ran 4 rounds for nothing when i'm not feeling well MRS tiu don believe i not feeling well.. i ran a short distance nia jiu cannot breathe heart pain like siao-.- SO xinku loh.. after that chinese lesson jiu no mood liao.. MR. JIT came in our class and shout here shout there again-.- not textbook ppls bring ur chair go to the back of the class and stand on the chair. LOLNESS! whole class went to the back except for 8 guai kia's who brought their textbook.. TengTeng included inside siiol.. after that MR. JIT left*.. THAT BAOYA teacher jiu step big liao cause got MR JIT aS the backup mah-.- LOL!

LOVE my DEAREST BI F0rever,

promise not to leave him.. and to find out our future together as one<33

HOPE tomorrow can meet him loh:D

2009-09-16T22:35:00.005+08:00

hi guys!
i'm back posting:D i'm quite worried loh, dono why recently heart keep pain loh, cant really breathe well.. perhaps its time i really book an appointment with the hospital to go for a health check up bah.. hope i'll be fine loh, perhaps is too stress up trying to help my brother change for the better? But no matter how hard i tried he still did not appreciate leh maybe he is still young bah. nehmind i'll give him time. dont have much to post so ya. hmm its been 16 days since me and bi stead le(: although i may not be the one he love the most but i'll still try my best to do my part as a stead loh:D i think i have a responsibility and i knew from the start that i love him the most so i think its reasonable loh. hmm now we are left with 2 more weeks till the one month anniversary thinking bout what can i do for him one the first month anni. hmm.. thinking.. okay i think i shall stop here bah post again as soon as i can online again kaes?:D

boy, thanks for the moment for all these while(:

i really did enjoy, love you! hope u can feel it and will appreciate my love for you loh<33

2009-09-12T12:55:00.004+08:00

Today cannot meet bi D: sobsob norh! nehmind meet him another day bah:D Just finish my homework..nothing to do now at home rot! sian loh.. what can i do now neh? dono what to do now le..post again at night bah!(:

life with him by my side is much cheerful le loh(:

hate to see him leave at all times..

how much i hope i could have him by my side,

every single day, mins and sec till the day i stop breathing:D

if he's unhappy i'll try to cheer him up!:D

iloveyou bi(:

2009-09-11T23:53:00.002+08:00

wah now having bad headache. die, i think later bi recover from his flu and fever than will be my turn to be sick norh. how? later cannot meet bi D: sobs! recover faster! aiyo dono what to do le narh.. ok lets talk bout just now.. 6.40p.m met tengteng at bedok de mrt platform. went city hall and meet Church de ppl go the musuem thingy.. headache throughout loh. 9.10p.m left there and came back bedok to have my dinner at kfc.. forward a message to tengteng bout the 10ways to see if u like a person.. she laugh like hell cause she got trick by me. Hahas! funny loh.. lost my mother de ez-link card norh D: bi thought i no money than actually want take cab sent me home siiol.. so touch when heard what he says loh.. so good hoh?:D love him forever narh<333

2009-09-11T10:35:00.003+08:00

Hi!:D
i'm here to post again(:
Bi now having lesson i so bored loh D:
post later now going out(:

2009-09-10T22:47:00.004+08:00

Bi de flu is getting worst now got fever somemore! D:
tomorrow wan go find him le.. takares of him(:
hope he recover soon enough for me to my meet my dear bibi Jason hahas:D
currently listening to songs:D, missing him and worrying bout him D:
dono what to post liao..
[Programs aligning up]
-Find my bi tomorrow and takares of him:D

-after that go temple baibai my Ah Gong :D P.S i miss him, he will always be living in my heart(:

-6.00p.m bus-ed to bedok inter meet tengteng at 6.15pm have to reach city hall at 7 for the musuem thingy.

-10.30 lattest bus-ed to bedok and bus-ed home(:

-Sunday, going east coast? maybe.. to have dinner..

P.S bi, i love you forever!:D

2009-09-10T13:10:00.005+08:00

today woke up at the time of 10 plusplus.. message bi first thing in the morning. found out that he didn't went school today, cause he's sick D: recover soon kaes? hope tomorrow can go out than takare of him norh? than maybe aft that go find tengteng.. silly bi, ytd go out coldcold got hood dont want wear still wan gimme somemore.. must think bout urself also mah aiyoyo.. must takare of yourself first hoh! i don care uh, next time go out u abit cold also must wear ur hood hoh!
Miss you bi,
your presence change my life:D
baby, i love you<33

2009-09-08T22:03:00.004+08:00

after watching.. i really regretted what i did loh.. i really neglect my grandfather in the past before he pass-ed away. and now, i don have the chance to say sorry or say i love you to my grandfather anymore.. if i ever had a chance that he could be alive standing infront of me.. i really will give him a hug and say sorry and also i love you ah gong to him.. but there is no longer the chance.. i must learn to accept the fact in order to move on happily and in order to let my grandfather in heaven not to worry.. Time has past. learn to let go(:
i'm sure i can stand up once again on my own(:

Ah gong, u will always be living in my heart(:

i love you ah gong and i'm sorry for neglecting u in the past forgive me:D

2009-09-08T21:31:00.003+08:00

can't wait to see bi tomorrow!:D
ok post again later bah..
i go watch channel U 只想说声对不起.. very touching norh..must control ownself cannot cry(:

2009-09-07T22:16:00.002+08:00

Bi forgive me and he choose to trust me one last time.. i should not really hide my problems to him.. next time i got every single prob i will tell you.. don care! not hiding anymore!(: promised.. still looking forward for wednesday norh D: so long.. i miss you like fuck siial.. okok.. i go sleep le.. bi also going sleep liao(:

love him forever!:D

2009-09-07T17:41:00.004+08:00

bibi is ignoring me!D: because i didn't tell him my problems.
i didn't mean it sorry D: don ignore me don leave me all alone here by myself, i miss you D':
really cried my heart out.. you promised to not leave me alone.. you promised to not be angry anymore.. don you remember? forgive me and lets move on together happily without hiding any things okay? i promise i really meant it and i really do.. please give me another chance..missing you terribly D:

life without you is so miserable,

i miss you so,

please don leave me alone all by myself here.

i'm sorry bi.

i'm really sorry.

i didn't mean to hide things from you.

it is really because i dont want you to be worry D':

♥070909♥

2009-09-07T09:36:00.001+08:00

woke up at 7am today.. no school yet so early-.- nothing to do loh.. finding lobang go out..
but dono can find not loh..cant meet bi today loh,cause his school end late today D: still waiting for wednesday..
jio cherry than later with tanghtangh also than speak thai i don understand jiu very sian.. than jio tengteng she havent reply.. jio fangting she will change change the date norh D: so sad leh.. hard to jio ppl out siiol.

2009-09-06T22:12:00.002+08:00

today whole day was so bored.. first thing in the morning wake up message bi..than after he angry with me cause of some stuffs uh.. but after awhile jiu ok le:D chatchatchat stop le as i need eat my lunch before tuition starts than after that the teacher make me wait so fucking long-.- stupid de loh.. after tuition went grandma house downstair eat steamboat with her and neighbours than after that 8 plus went meeting LeTing @130.. asked TengTeng if she wanted to meet us too? than she said i am cute to had jio her out late at night-.- lol she's sure cute right? hahas...chatchatchat... i saw one weirdo uncle walk untill so creepy eeyer... awhile m0re LeTing reach we walked to inter disturbing TengTeng all the way.. although we went out just for awhile but its quite fun lah. laughing thoughout like a retard... than 9.02 jiu went bedok inter wait for bus go home loh.. bored loh... zzz-.- missing him.. hope we will last! and will do my best to keep this relationship going smoothly thoughout(:

2009-09-06T12:01:00.003+08:00

wake up at 6.47am today dono what happen suddenly can wake up so early this few days siiol.. currently so bored.. listening to Utada hikadu-come back to me.. so nice!:D sian loh later got tuition.. missing my boyfriend now loh D: nehmind meeting on wednesday or friday le!:D

2009-09-06T00:05:00.002+08:00

new blog up!:D hope everything will be a good start and everything will goes on smoothly(:
love him always!(: